Never ending hope

I hope you find what you looking for
whatever it may be
I hope you are not deceive and I will never able to say 'I told you so'
but if you did and if I did
hopefully you learn something from it
because in this beautiful and wonderful world
ironically, the people in it are not so beautiful and wonderful
unfortunately, the people in it can be cruel and wicked

I just wish you know better
cause' you are always more careful and wiser than me
you are always mature and sensible
you are always clever and confident
but I'm afraid not this time around, honey
you may ended up breaking your heart
and that would be such a shame for a beautiful and wonderful person like you...

-sweethanie,
unleashing my ever locked emotions.

HAVING A COKE WITH YOU

is more fun than going to San Sebastian, Irun, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne
or being sick on my stomach on the Travesare de Gracia in Barcelona
partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian
partly because of my love for you, partly because of you love to yoghurt
partly because of the fluorescent orange tulips around the birches
partly because of the secrecy our smiles take on before people and statuary
it is hard to believe when I'm with you that they can be anything as still
as solemn as unpleasantly definitive as statuary when right in front of it
in the warm New York 4 o'clock light we are drifting back and forth
between each other like a tree breathing through it spectacles

and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint
you suddenly wonder why in the world why anyone did them

I look
at you and I rather look at you than all the portraits in the world
except possibly for the Polish Rider occasionally and anyway it's in the Frick
which thank heavens you haven't gone to yet so we can go together the first time
and the fact that you move so beautifully more or less take cares of Futurism
just as at home I never think of the Nude Descending a Staircase or
at rehearsal a single drawing of Leonardo or Michelangelo that used to wow me
and what good does all the research of the Impressionist do them
when they never got the right person to stand near the tree when the sun sank
or for that matter Marino Marini when he didn't pick the rider
as carefully as the horse

is seems they were all cheated for some marvelous experience
which is not going to go wasted on me which is I'm telling you about it

-Frank O'Hara

One of my favourite poem.., what a wonderful and amazing poem by O'Hara and turn out to be it is featured in Beastly the movie. When I watched the movie last Saturday, I was like.., "Wow.., having a coke with you, that is my all time fav poem, AWESOME" :)

Enjoy the poem.., Feel it.., Cherish it.., Adore it...

Always be my love

B, is always by my side.., no matter whether I’m happy or sad.., but especially when I’m lonely and down.., B was always there - in my long journey inside the train from Klang to Seramban, in my miserable day of having a bad feeling after hurting the one that I love, in my bored day of having nothing to do and just.., just whenever I in need somebody or something.., B was always there.., I hold into it tightly.., not wanting to let go. B lets me explore other places, cultures and thoughts that is so foreign for me, tell me so many things.., sometimes it makes me laugh so hard, I can't even stop. And once a while, it makes me cry.., but in good way, I cry because it tells me that I’m fortune enough, unlike million people out there.., Sometimes, it let me taste the sweetness of fantasy, something that are beyond my imagination. Sometimes it taught me about life and humanity., so good to me.., so comforting.., especially having B when I’m laying down in a rainy day on my bed, just being lazy, rolling around and holding it in my hand and staring and focusing at B with my eyes..

Therefore, thank you B.., thank you dear.., my dearest B.., my beloved B.., my B.., even though there are so many of you, I will try to love all of you equally.., equally…, Thank you my baby B..

My B, my BOOKS…

Love you always.. xoxo :)

ne regrette rien

I regret nothing. There have been things I missed, but I ask no questions, because I have loved it, such as it has been, even the moments of emptiness, even the unanswered — and that I loved it, that is the unanswered in my life.

~The Fountainhead, Ayn Rand~